Do You Care About Your Relationship With Christ?

Introduction: The Question That Haunted Me

I woke up in the middle of the night last week. Not from a nightmare. Not from a noise. I woke up because a question was burning in my chest like a hot coal. It was not a question from the devil meant to condemn me. I believe it was a question from the Holy Spirit meant to awaken me.

The question was this: Do you actually care about your relationship with Christ?

Not, "Do you go to church?" Not, "Do you read your Bible?" Not, "Do you call yourself a Christian?" Those are easy questions. They are surface-level. They can be answered with a quick yes and a checklist.

But this question went deeper. It went down into the marrow of my soul. It asked about care. About priority. About love.

I am writing this because I believe someone needs to hear it. Maybe you are like me. Maybe you have been going through the motions. Maybe you have been relying on a prayer you prayed twenty years ago. Maybe you have been trusting in your baptism, your church membership, or your good behavior.

But the question remains, and it will not go away until you answer it honestly before God: Do you care about your relationship with Christ?

Because here is the truth that kept me up at night: If you do not care about your relationship with Christ now, you will not care about it when you stand before Him.

If you do not want Him now, you will not want Him then.

This is not a game. This is not a casual blog post. I am writing this as if your life depends on it, because according to Jesus, it absolutely does.

The Danger of Going Through the Motions

I have to start with a warning. It is a warning I need to hear myself.

In the book of Revelation, Jesus dictated letters to seven churches. These were real churches with real people. They were doing religious things. They were busy. They were active. But to one church, the church in Ephesus, Jesus said something terrifying.

"But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first" (Revelation 2:4, ESV).

Think about that. Jesus looked at a church that was working hard, enduring patiently, and testing false teachers. On paper, they looked great. But Jesus saw the heart. He saw that the machinery was running, but the fire had gone out.

They had orthodoxy. They had activity. They had endurance. But they had lost their first love.

I had to ask myself: Is that me? Am I Ephesus? Do I have the right doctrine but a cold heart? Do I go through the motions of Christianity without the passion of actually knowing Christ?

The scariest part is that the Ephesians probably did not realize it. They thought they were fine. They needed Jesus to tell them, "Look at yourself. You have fallen."

If you can read that and not feel a chill go down your spine, you might already be in danger.

Jesus did not tell them to just try harder. He told them to remember, repent, and do the works they did at first (Revelation 2:5). He called them back to the beginning. He called them back to the love.

So let me ask you directly: When did you last weep over your sin? When did you last feel overwhelmed by the grace of God? When did you last sit in silence just to be with Jesus, not to check a box?

If you cannot remember, you may have abandoned your first love.

The Difference Between Knowing About Jesus and Knowing Jesus

There is a difference between knowing about someone and actually knowing them.

I know a lot about famous people. I know their names, their jobs, their public stories. But I do not know them. I have never spoken to them. They do not know me. There is no relationship.

Many professing Christians are exactly like that. They know facts about Jesus. They know He was born in Bethlehem. They know He walked on water. They know He died on a cross. They know He rose again. They believe these facts are true.

But believing facts is not the same as having a relationship.

James addresses this directly:

"You believe that God is one; you do well. Even the demons believe—and shudder!" (James 2:19, ESV).

The demons believe in God. They know He exists. They know Jesus is the Son of God. They know the theology better than most humans. But they are not saved. They are not in a relationship. They are enemies.

What separates a believer from a demon? It is not knowledge. It is love. It is trust. It is surrender.

A demon knows Jesus is Lord and hates Him. A Christian knows Jesus is Lord and loves Him.

Do you love Him? Not just the idea of Him. Not just what He can do for you. Not just the fire insurance He provides. Do you love Him?

Peter was asked this question by Jesus after the resurrection. Jesus did not ask Peter, "Do you have the right doctrine?" He asked, "Simon, son of John, do you love me?" (John 21:16). Three times He asked it.

That is the only question that matters in the end. Not "Did you go to church?" but "Did you love Me?"

Examining the Fruit

Jesus said something that should make every one of us stop and think carefully.

"Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep's clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves. You will recognize them by their fruits" (Matthew 7:15-16, ESV).

He was talking about false teachers, but the principle applies to all of us. You recognize a tree by its fruit. If a tree is an apple tree, it produces apples. If a tree is a thorn bush, it produces thorns.

If I am in a real, living relationship with Jesus Christ, there will be fruit. There will be evidence. Not perfect performance, but genuine fruit.

What kind of fruit?

1. A desire for obedience.
Jesus said, "If you love me, you will keep my commandments" (John 14:15, ESV). Notice the order. Keeping the commandments does not make you love Him. Loving Him results in keeping the commandments. If I claim to love Jesus but have no regard for what He commands, I am lying to myself.

2. A hatred of sin.
When you love someone, you care about what offends them. If I love my wife, I do not do things that I know will break her heart. If I love Jesus, I cannot coddle sin. I cannot make peace with it. I cannot sleep comfortably while grieving the Holy Spirit. David wrote, "I hate the work of those who fall away; it shall not cling to me" (Psalm 101:3, ESV). Do you hate sin? Or do you just hate getting caught?

3. A love for other believers.
John is very blunt about this: "If anyone says, 'I love God,' and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen" (1 John 4:20, ESV). How do you treat the family of God? Do you hold grudges? Do you gossip? Do you ignore the needs of your brothers and sisters? That is not the fruit of a loving relationship with Christ.

4. A longing for His return.
Paul told Timothy that there is a "crown of righteousness" reserved for "all who have loved his appearing" (2 Timothy 4:8, ESV). Do you long for Jesus to come back? Or would you rather He wait a while so you can enjoy this world a little longer? If the thought of Jesus returning today fills you with dread instead of joy, you need to examine your heart.

These are not hoops to jump through to earn salvation. They are the natural evidence that salvation is actually there. A fire produces heat. If there is no heat, there is no fire.

The Parable of the Soils

Jesus told a parable that cuts right to the heart of this issue. It is the parable of the sower, found in Matthew 13, Mark 4, and Luke 8. In this story, the seed is the Word of God, and the soil is the human heart.

There are four types of soil.

The Path: The seed is snatched away immediately. The person hears the Word but does not understand it. The devil takes it away. This person never even starts.

The Rocky Ground: The seed springs up quickly because the soil is shallow. But when the sun comes up (tribulation or persecution), the plant withers because it has no root. This person responds emotionally to the gospel but has no depth. When trouble comes, they fall away.

The Thorny Ground: The seed grows, but thorns grow up with it and choke it. Jesus explains that the thorns are "the cares of the world and the deceitfulness of riches" (Matthew 13:22, ESV). This person is not necessarily an enemy of the gospel. They are just distracted. They care about their job, their money, their family, their comfort—more than they care about Christ. The thorns choke the life out of them.

The Good Soil: This person hears the Word, understands it, and bears fruit.

I have to ask myself: Which soil am I?

Many people in the church today are rocky ground or thorny ground. They looked like believers for a while. They had a moment. They made a decision. But when life got hard, or when the world got appealing, they drifted away.

They did not lose their salvation. They revealed that they never had it.

John wrote, "They went out from us, but they were not of us; for if they had been of us, they would have continued with us. But they went out, that it might become plain that they all are not of us" (1 John 2:19, ESV).

Continuance is the proof of reality. If you do not continue in the faith, if you do not continue caring about your relationship with Christ, it becomes plain that you were never truly His.

The Cost of Not Caring

I am not writing this to scare you for no reason. I am writing this because the stakes are infinite.

Jesus talked about hell more than anyone in the Bible. He described it as a place where "the worm does not die and the fire is not quenched" (Mark 9:48, ESV). He called it "outer darkness," where there will be "weeping and gnashing of teeth" (Matthew 8:12, ESV).

He told a story about a rich man and a beggar named Lazarus. The rich man died and went to Hades, being in torment. He begged for just one drop of water to cool his tongue (Luke 16:24). One drop. And it was denied.

If you do not care about your relationship with Christ now, that is where you are headed. Not because God is mean, but because you rejected the only cure. You rejected the only Light. You chose the world over the Savior.

"For what does it profit a man to gain the whole world and forfeit his soul?" (Mark 8:36, ESV).

You can have everything this world offers. You can have money, pleasure, success, and comfort. You can have the admiration of men. You can have a perfect reputation. And if you do not have Christ, you have nothing. You have lost your soul.

Does that frighten you? It should. It frightens me.

The Urgency of Now

There is another danger I have to mention. It is the danger of delay.

The Bible says, "Behold, now is the favorable time; behold, now is the day of salvation" (2 Corinthians 6:2, ESV).

Not tomorrow. Not next week. Not when you get your life together. Now.

The longer you wait to care about your relationship with Christ, the harder your heart becomes. Every time you ignore the Holy Spirit, you are building a callus over your soul. Every time you put off repentance, you are digging a deeper hole.

The writer of Hebrews pleads with us: "Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts" (Hebrews 3:7-8, ESV).

If you feel something stirring as you read this, that is the Holy Spirit. He is knocking. He is calling. He is giving you another chance to answer the question honestly.

Do not wait. Do not assume you have more time. You do not know how much time you have. Your life is "a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes" (James 4:14, ESV).

Heart Examination Questions

I want to pause here. I want to do something that might feel uncomfortable, but it is necessary. I want to ask you some questions. Not surface questions. Not the kind of questions you can answer while thinking about what you are having for dinner.

I want to ask you questions that require you to stop. To put the phone down. To look up at the ceiling and be honest with yourself and with God.

The Bible says, "Examine yourselves, to see whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves" (2 Corinthians 13:5, ESV).

This is that moment. This is the test.

Question 1: When was the last time you truly wept over your sin?

Not when you got caught. Not when someone confronted you. I mean, when was the last time you were alone with God and the weight of your rebellion against Him broke your heart? When was the last time you looked at the cross and realized, "My sin put Him there," and it moved you to tears?

If you cannot remember, or if it has been years, ask yourself why. Is it because you have become comfortable with sin? Is it because you have convinced yourself that you are "not that bad"?

Question 2: Do you actually enjoy spending time with God?

Think carefully. When you pray, is it a duty or a delight? When you read your Bible, are you just looking for a verse to check off your list, or are you truly hungry to hear from Him? If God was not useful to you—if He did not answer prayers or make your life better—would you still want to be with Him?

The Psalms say, "As a deer pants for flowing streams, so pants my soul for you, O God" (Psalm 42:1, ESV). Does your soul pant for God? Or does it pant for entertainment, comfort, and approval?

Question 3: What do you think about when your mind wanders?

When you are driving, or showering, or lying in bed at night waiting to fall asleep—where do your thoughts go? Do they drift toward Jesus? Do you find yourself meditating on Scripture, on His goodness, on His return? Or do your thoughts drift toward lust, resentment, worry about money, or fantasies about a different life?

What occupies your mind when no one is watching is what you actually love.

Question 4: Do you secretly love sins that you publicly condemn?

This is a hard one, but I have to ask it. Is there a sin in your life that you would be devastated to give up? Is there something you are holding onto—a relationship, a habit, a secret pleasure—that you know displeases God, but you are terrified to let it go?

Jesus said, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me" (Matthew 16:24, ESV). A cross is not something you carry for fun. A cross is something you die on. Is there anything you are refusing to die to?

Question 5: How do you respond to correction?

When someone confronts you about a sin, or when a sermon cuts deep, what is your immediate reaction? Do you get defensive? Do you make excuses? Do you blame others? Or do you humbly accept it, thank God for the warning, and run to repent?

The writer of Proverbs says, "Whoever heeds reproof is prudent" (Proverbs 15:5, ESV). A person who does not care about their relationship with Christ cannot handle being told they are wrong.

Question 6: Do you care more about what people think of you than what God knows about you?

Are you more concerned with your reputation than your character? Do you clean up the outside while the inside is full of dead men's bones, as Jesus said to the Pharisees (Matthew 23:27)? If you could sin in secret and no human would ever find out, would you do it?

The person who loves Christ cares about what God sees, even if no one else ever knows.

Question 7: Do you long for heaven, or are you afraid of it?

Be honest. When you think about eternity, when you think about standing before Jesus and spending forever in His presence, does that thought fill you with joy or with dread? If you are honest, would you rather Jesus just wait a while so you can enjoy a few more decades on earth first?

If heaven is just being with Jesus forever, and that thought does not excite you, you have to ask yourself if you actually love Jesus at all.

Question 8: When was the last time you shared your faith?

Not out of obligation. Not because a program told you to. I mean, when was the last time you talked to someone about Jesus because you genuinely cared about their soul? When was the last time you lost sleep over an unsaved family member or coworker?

If you do not care about the souls of others, it might be because you do not truly understand the value of your own soul.

Question 9: Do you have any secret sins you are hiding?

Is there an incognito browser tab in your life? Is there a secret bank account, a secret relationship, a secret grudge? Are you living a double life? The person in the mirror knows. God knows. And if you are hiding something, it is poisoning your soul.

"Be sure your sin will find you out" (Numbers 32:23, ESV). It may not find you out today, but it will. And if you die with unconfessed, unrepented sin in your life, it will be the evidence that you never truly knew Him.

Question 10: If Jesus stood before you right now, what would you say to Him?

Imagine for a moment that the room went silent, and Jesus Christ appeared in visible form. He looked at you with those eyes like flames of fire. And He simply waited for you to speak.

What would come out of your mouth? Would it be praise? Would it be confession? Would it be terror? Would you fall at His feet like John did in Revelation, as though dead? Or would you be paralyzed by fear because you have spent your whole life ignoring Him?

What If I Realize I Don't Care?

Let me speak to the person who has read these questions and is feeling convicted. Maybe you are realizing that you do not care. Maybe you are seeing that your Christianity is fake, shallow, or dead.

What do you do?

You do not try harder. You do not make a New Year's resolution. You do not just go to church more.

You run to Jesus.

You go to the cross. You look at the One who was pierced for your transgressions. You see the blood He shed for sinners exactly like you. And you cry out to Him.

The prayer does not have to be fancy. It just has to be real.

"Lord, I am a hypocrite. I have pretended to know You, but I do not love You. I have gone through the motions, but my heart is far from You. I am afraid that I am lost. Have mercy on me, a sinner. Save me. Give me a new heart. Make me care. I put my trust in You and what You did on the cross. Please, Lord, save me."

If you pray that and mean it, He will answer. He promised:

"Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved" (Romans 10:13, ESV).

"I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh" (Ezekiel 36:26, ESV).

He can make you care. He can give you love where there is only coldness. He can resurrect a dead soul.

That is the gospel. That is the good news. Jesus did not come for people who have it all together. He came for sinners. He came for the lukewarm. He came for people like me.

The Joy of Caring

I want to end with hope, not just warning.

Caring about your relationship with Christ is not a burden. It is a joy. It is what you were made for.

The Westminster Shorter Catechism says, "Man's chief end is to glorify God, and to enjoy Him forever."

We were designed to know God. We were designed to love Him. When we actually care about our relationship with Him, we are finally functioning the way we were built to function. It is like a fish discovering water. It is like an eagle learning to fly.

David wrote, "In your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore" (Psalm 16:11, ESV).

The world promises joy and delivers misery. Christ promises joy and delivers forever.

When you care about Jesus, you do not lose out on life. You find it. He said, "Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it" (Matthew 10:39, ESV).

Letting go of the world to cling to Christ is not loss. It is infinite gain.

Answer the Question

I am going to end the way I started. With the question.

Do you care about your relationship with Christ?

Not, "Does your pastor think you care?" Not, "Does your mom think you care?" Not, "Do you look like a Christian on Sunday morning?"

Do you care?

Does your heart beat for Him? Do you think about Him during the day? Do you miss Him when you neglect prayer? Do you hate the sin that separates you from Him? Do you long for the day when you will see Him face to face?

If the answer is yes, praise God. Keep going. Keep fighting. Keep loving Him. He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion (Philippians 1:6).

If the answer is no, or if you are not sure, do not wait another minute. Fall on your knees. Cry out to Jesus. He is near. He hears. He saves.

I am Michael. I follow Jesus Christ and the Bible alone. And I am begging you, as someone who cares about your soul: answer the question honestly, and let the answer drive you to the Savior.

"Seek the Lord while he may be found; call upon him while he is near" (Isaiah 55:6, ESV).

Today. Now. Do not wait.

Amen.

A Prayer for the Reader

Father in heaven, I lift up the person reading these words. You know their heart. You know whether they love You or not. I pray that You would tear down every wall of deception. I pray that You would remove every mask. I pray that You would give them the gift of repentance and the gift of faith. If they are cold, warm them. If they are dead, raise them. If they are pretending, expose them in love. Draw them to Jesus, and hold them fast. I ask this in the name of Your Son, my Savior, Jesus Christ. Amen.